13/3/2008

Looks like i nvr did remember wat i wana say yesterday...n if u can judge by now i m incredibly irritated nowadays...easily provoked through trivial matters...i guess i cant hold it all in anymore...n sum ppl hav aledi noticed tis change..sum stayed away due to the shock i guess...i started to really speak my piece of mind in most things...nvr cared for the feelings of others anymore...who cared for mine?...but i m incredibly disappointed in my frenship wif a girl...yeaps..the same one i mentioned a few posts ago...i tot can hav a go wif her...but no...it was my own foolish imagination again...i m not blogging about it to remind myself itz an illusion n i shud not bring my hopes up anymore...in reality our frenship nvr progressed to begin wif...i really thought it was getting better...certain times i could onli think of telling her wen i m very troubled...i know she iz available one thing...but she sleeps too early...erm...i think if u wana complain itz better to talk to a girl...first of all they listen better than guys...i forgot another reason much more solid than tis though...erm guys r not tat good at comforting i guess...hey...no wonder girls dun find me for comfort!! hahaha...mayb itz our lack of emotion compared to females? they r able to touch the hearts of others as well as themselves better??? dunno how to put it in words...anyhow the majority of girls here r either taken or sleep early or really not suitable to talk to....i really need sumone in my life now...sumone to talk to...sumone to escape to...no nid to solve problems for me...erm..letz say i m very frustrated in the middle of the night over a project or sumthing...i juz wana message sumone n hav a slight chat...sumone i know will b there for me...will try to cheer me up...no need to succeed...juz to see her try itz good enuf for me...means i m being cared for aledi i guess...top all of tis up wif ppl around me who kept on disappointing me in a lot of ways...sum r new while sum r expected i guess....but i did hope they will change...they nvr thought bout the effects they will hav on others...it iz incredibly lonely wen u r able to see the world differently from everyone else...haihz...if onli i m talking to a person now n not towards tis blog...i need sumone to go through the nites together...hahaha not the way u r thinking though...'u'...iz anyone reading tis post anyway =_=...plz...anyone out there who needs sumone in the middle of the night...i will always b available...my hp iz open 24/7...n itz set on loud..hopefully i didnt turn it to silent mode though...but i guess most of the girls here hav sumone aledi eh?? or they have each other for now...as best frens lah!! wat else u thinking...haihz...oh yeah a few days ago another fella tried to tackle my problems...hahaha in the end nothing changed...wakakaka...life goes on eh?? now to quote sumthing i learn from a manga...wen u r exposed to a greater power...2 choices...either u reach for the summit of tat power or u juz admit u r weak n give up the fight altogether....u wan to challenge the summit...u will think 'i wana do it too!!'...er...another quote from a different manga....there r no strong or weak ppl in tis world...onli those tat work hard to b strong or those tat do not...hahaha....u actually learn a lot bout life in sumthing ppl deem a waste of time or an immature hobby...i think i can blog whole night but itz approaching 4 now...sien...really truly sien...tomolo most prob i will blog again...sumthing will happen...