Emotions run high...

Today is thursday liao...went to work n greeted wif a defect report from the users/clients...i sighed and went to work on fixing it and preparing my report...itz not a routine thing but bcoz a report came in about a month ago n i got very anxious bout it coz nvr receive sumthing like tat before...itz kinda like a customer complaint...so the related procedures r still quite fresh in my head...but onli thoughts bout the aftermath of such complaints streak through my head...another complaint i thought...year-end appraisal sure die liao lo...wat bout bonus??...i place a very high importance on the year-end bonus...but if really dun hav i oso kenot do anything bout it...such iz the state of my working life...perhaps most of u r wondering...why i nvr go search for the cause? well...the cause iz easy...i juz didnt found the defect...was i not looking hard enuf? not really either...i duno where to look...unless i m the user, i dun think i can really anticipate how i m gona deal wif the application...and my small amount of experience cant help much...haha the defect was from sumthing i coded back in february...back then i only worked for 7 months?...at least i could understand my mistake immediately now...well sumtimes u r buried in yur tasks n u cant see so clearly...but no matter...i know some of u thinking i m juz giving excuses...so i wont waste much more of my words trying to justify my own thinking..ahh...today i sure am emotional...i myself can feel it...i get irritated easily...n i didnt hav much morale to do anything at all...not to mention i lost a round of dota juz now..shud hav juz chatted in msn n watched some anime...everything iz building up at the core of my being...it feels terrible...i dun even know wat i wan to do now...cry? sleep? hit ppl? laugh? play games?...heart juz feels heavy...wat can i do to make it go away? i dun hav much frens nearby...even if i do hav, itz fast approaching 12...some of them nid to work la etc...on MSN? well talking bout matters like tis in MSN might not b a good idea since misunderstandings can occur quite easily...or i will do wat i usually do....swallow it n sleep..n it will stock-pile...soon it will bcome a mountain n a wall...i know itz a bad habit but can u blame me? i m skewered by my own past and factors i could not control...doesnt even leave room for me to breath...i consider myself resilient but this has gone far enough...if days like this were to occur more often....i dun think i can take it anymore...