15/10/2007

Sometimes it iz so hard to explain to other ppl bout my problems from the beginning...sumtimes it iz frustrating as well...all my problems r related...one of the reasons i dun go out tat often iz bcoz...no one actually invites me tat often...wen i m free, ppl r not....wen i m not...ppl r free...i m lonely...n it goes on n on n on...hehe...sumtimes i juz swallow my feelings n agree to wat u all say...kinda lazy to talk anymore...i always think tat other ppl's way of thinking iz too simple...but mayb i m making things too complicated?...there r sumthings i can nvr ignore though...mayb itz the way i grow up..the environment..my past...my experiences...i dun like it wen ppl make everything sound so simple...if it iz...most of us would hav done it...there r many things to think about...like the consequences of our actions to the ppl around us as well as ourselves...the benefits if there iz...as well as the need...for instance going supper nia...i go supper bcoz i need food...i m hungry...n oso can go out n laugh a bit...but the recent supper trips were kinda bad...anyhow those r different stories tat i rather not talk about now...otherwise it would nvr end...gone r the reckless days...wen u think of sumthing then u juz do it...i dun think i can do it anymore...or izzit the circumstances does not let me to do it? or izzit tat i hav juz gotten soft n weak? mayb the king wai a few years back iz crazy n acts b4 he thinks...hahaha...but there iz no one to make sure nia...most of my frens in the past iz gone walking their own paths...sum didnt see for over a year or 2...got frenster geh...but duno wat to say anymore...but one thing iz for sure...the best days r gone...i think? hav there been best days b4?? surrounded by frens...i know i hav ppl tat i trust...but do they trust me as much as i do?? will they betray me?? i dun really think bout tis stuff in the past...