28/10/2007

I am here once again nia~~~tis time blogging around 2am in the morning...finally finished my syllabus once de..kinda lazy wana continue though...hehe...spend a lot of time here watching anime, playing games...hahaha...as exam time comes near the more relaxed i bcome...dunno why...but i juz hope tat tis period of time will b over...i hav enuf of tis sem aledi...not tat bad...not tat good either...perhaps i did pretty good in my studies or my responsibilities...but my social life iz still terrible...i think it might hav gotten worst!!...hm...but kenot compare wif my first year coz a lot of things different de nia...but in the end my lack of mandarin mastery still bites at me...i still feel i m missing out on a lot of things juz bcoz i dunno mandarin...language...iz a big obstacle to frenship? Sometimes the most important things in a frenship between 2 ppl are done without words...often wif juz a smile ^_^...iz my view towards all tis stuff so different from ppl? tat sum even think of me as weird? perhaps i m juz too naive? heh....continue to suffer in silence daily...wat i can do iz juz record it down in blogs like tis...at the very least i got complain somewhere...i misjudged a few things in the past nia...sumthings didnt really turn out like how i thought it would...mayb i was juz too desperate or i wasnt thinking straight...tonight the moon iz full..stars so bright...who shares the same view? who really appreciates it? to me, the moon iz beautiful...how i wish tat one day...i can view the same thing wif a group of frens...juz enjoying the moment, the peace as well as the midnight wind...now, there r other things more satisfying than dota aledi...i hav finally understand tat last year..but even so...haihz...perhaps i will follow the route of a story i came to know sumtime ago...where the student will graduate not wif tears of happiness...but tears of loneliness..perhaps i will b thrown in the air n take sum pictures..but those r juz momentary...deep inside i guess all of us know...it iz fake...as fake as my smile could be right now...i wana mention another quote...'If sumone would tell me that it is okay to live, i will buy a small mirror and practice smiling'...hopefully i wont fall down to tat level...the person who mentioned it got a fulfilling ending though....all her suffering were recognised, accepted and healed by the person she likes the most....fairytale ending? who knows? hehehe